Sexual Schizophrenia—Teenagers and Sex

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A fifth of all American 15-year-olds are sexually active. By the age of 16, that number rises to 33 percent, or a third of all teens, to 61% of 18-year-olds and to 71% of 19-year-olds. There is little difference by gender in the timing of first sex. (Guttmacher Institute, June 2013) For a comprehensive overview of teen sexual behavior by the country's leading and most respected researchers into teen sexual and reproductive health visit [http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/FB-ATSRH.html]. 

  

I don't know of any other topic that so completely reveals our culture's schizophrenic attitude toward human sexuality than that of teenagers' sexual behavior. Teens have access to a great deal of sexually explicit material but to far less clear, honest, unbiased information about sex.  Conservatives constantly bemoan the problem of teen pregnancy yet continually try to dismantle comprehensive sex education programs in public schools and close Planned Parenthood clinics across the country ostensibly to stop abortion but in reality to deny teens access. Unfortunately a local Planned Parenthood affiliate is often the only place a teenager can get honest answers to their questions about sex, STIs (sexually transmitted infections) and contraceptives.

I have talked with a number of women who as adolescents suffered untreated STIs or horrific damage to their wombs during botched abortions, which prevented them from bearing children in the future. Both could have been prevented if the girl could have openly discussed her interest in becoming sexually active with her parents and they had given her complete unbiased information. Ideally parents should show their comfort with and openness to discussing sex with their children at the time they ask their first questions.

Openness to discussing contraception need not imply acceptance or encouragement of their daughter or son's decision. Parents, if opposed to this (and most parents are), need to state their opposition clearly and honestly without resorting to threats or scare tactics while realizing that unless they have their child under 24 hour supervision, there is no way they can prevent sex from happening. Teens I have had in discussion groups about sexual behavior, who have had this kind of openness with their parents, told me they delayed their first sexual experience out of respect for their parents' wishes. This is a 'win-win' if there ever was one.

[1976: On a nationally televised morning talk show, Dr. Ruth Westheimer, an American sex therapist, shocked her host and her viewers by suggesting that society should encourage teens to practice mutual masturbation instead of coitus. She posited that this would decrease the number of teen pregnancies, prevent the spread of STIs among teens, and teach teens about each other's bodies, foreplay, and sexual response. I heartily endorse this for teens instead of, and for adult couples as an occasional alternative to, intercourse.]

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